The Chapter I Just Walked Out Of

Well. It's certainly been a while, hasn't it? Since I last posted, my life has whirled from empty to full.... of things to do all the time. I started college four weeks ago, and as with any big life change, this one has caused a giant soul shift. I feel much different than I did over this past summer..... many of my fundamental thoughts and ideas have changed since then, and I'm working to fit all the puzzle pieces together and see where it's all taking me. Which is a work in process, as usual. But college has been a very interesting experience so far and I find I'm quite liking it.
I wrote this poem two months ago. I've wanted to post it for a time, but I'm finally getting around to doing it. I'm not sure of it's title, but I will preface it by saying that it describes the chapter I just walked out of...the long dry summer I just endured. I don't feel this way anymore, in fact I feel quite identity-less these days, lost in a bigger place than I've ever been. But this poem is an important piece of my voice, so I wanted to share it.

I am partial to poetry.
And alliterations.
I wear chokers for confidence and my eyes are the color of a pre-storm sky in spring.
I spent my childhood reading fat books and the first time I fell in love I whispered the secret to a tree.

I romanticize other humans almost as much
as I romanticize myself
Searching for wisdom in first waking hours and deeper meaning in smiles...
I may never know if it's really there.

And I live my days like I'm holding my breath, waiting for the earth shattering adventure, the mind bending change, the roguish Prince Charming to shake me out of my glass globe world.
It never comes. I'm still holding my breath for adventure, still wearing my chokers with cute outfits doomed to only be seen by small children and grandmothers...
I'm still holding my breath for a daring choice, wishing with all the fierceness I have that I could have a chance to lose the air in my lungs for a reason bigger than seeing you in the hallway.

I am wasting so much time being a poem when nobody wants to read it.